college

April-June Secrets!

“I injured my foot 2 years ago which eventually caused a knee injury that hasn’t gone away. I’ve seen several doctors and tried physical therapy. Nothing seems to work. I’m falling more and more into a deep depression. Exercising helped me combat my depression and anxiety for years. It’s always been my shield. But now, I can’t to run or do anything aerobic without being pain. I just got laid off, physical ailments, and a dramatic experience with an ex. This year hasn’t produced anything positive thus far. I haven’t felt this low in a long time. My mind is going into dark places.”


“I’ve accomplished a lot in life, but I don’t think I’ll ever beat my scalp picking addiction.”


“I think most people who say they’re my friends just feel sorry for me because they think I’m weird.”

January-March Secrets!

Editor’s note:

I’m sorry it has taken me so long to post these (they were submitted in January and February)! I don’t have a good excuse, I’ve just been a little overwhelmed for the past few months for a few reasons and got behind. But as always, I have no intentions of abandoning TerpSecret. As long as one person in the world has a secret to share, I’ll be here.

Also, both of these make me wish I could respond to the people who submitted them. As crazy as my life gets sometimes, I always want to help people who reach out to me. If you don’t have a secret but need advice, I’m here to help.

❤ Sarah


“My ex-girlfriend and I broke up, but we decided to have sex one last time and my condom broke. I didn’t cum and she took plan B. She began bleeding a week later which is 2 weeks before her normal period. I’ve been freaking out every day and have had extreme anxiety. I tried to be there for her, but she abruptly stopped talking to me and won’t return any of my calls.

After this experience, I have come to the conclusion that I never want to have sex again or ever involve myself in a relationship. There is way too much pain and stress associated with it.”


“Every once in a while I’ll do this thing, where I lay in bed all day pretending I’m dead just to see if anyone would notice if I killed myself overnight. I’ve come to the conclusion that my body would have to start to smell before anyone even tried knocking on my door. The longest time was 42 hours. Two days I laid in bed and didn’t make a single sound, didn’t eat or watch TV. Nobody even texted to see where I was. I stayed away from home to see how long it would take someone to notice I was gone. Two weeks until someone tried to get a hold of me. If I died, it would take my family days to realize it.”

May Secrets!

We all have secrets, so unleash yours.

We all have secrets, so unleash yours.

“I have an eating disorder. I thought I was over it, I used to be bulimic to the point that I’d be nauseous if I ate, and then it transformed to Anorexia when it came to much to handle. My friend had me start smoking weed, it made me hungry and not give a fuck. I’ve been smoking since I was 16, and I thought I was over my disorder. The past few days I have not smoked, I can not eat and when I try to I feel like I’m going to throw up until I finally just made myself. I realize today that I never got over it, I masked the symptoms, but I never got to the root of the issue. The real problem is I hate myself.”

——-

“I drink at work. On the job. My coffee always has Jamison. My coke always has rum. And the saddest part, is I’m so functional no one notices.”

——-

“I never feel like I’m good enough in anything I do. It’s gotten to the point where I don’t try so I have an excuse afterwards. It makes me settle and I am tired of settling, but I’m stuck with this habit of self-sabotage.”

——-

“I keep myself awake at night envisioning what it would be like to get in fights with people I don’t like.”

——-

“I resent my parents for not doing things right the first time. They love me and I love them, but they screwed up my life.”

——-

“I have an eating disorder.
Finally realizing this after the third doctor has told me to see someone.
I fight it though sometimes I find myself having gone a day or two having eaten nothing but a cup of coffee I don’t need help.
I’ve figured it out so far and I’m working on it.
I can be strong.
sometimes…”

——-

“I hate the way I act when I drink because I know everyone else hates it to, so when my friends ask me to go out I make excuses just to avoid being talked about behind my back.”

April Secrets!

Anyone ever get the feeling of:

‘Hey mom and dad I wanna do these great things!’
-me

‘Well that’s great, we support you. But you shouldnt do that, you should do this.’
-parents

Apparently I can’t live my dreams, I have to live the dreams they want me to dream. I also think it’s horse-shit.

#forevertheblacksheep”

——-

“I pretend that I love what I’m doing but I really just do it all to prove a point.”

——-

My biological dad pretty much made it apparent that he didn’t think I would amount to anything and was a complete failure because I smoked weed. (Which is only because he smokes weed and never did anything). He kicked me out a longtime ago, and he doesn’t even know this but I’m in college again. I’m an anthropology major. I plan to get my masters. I have STRAIGHT A’S. And before every test I get as high as possible. In 3 out of 4 of my classes I have the best grade. Am I a failure still, daddy?”

——-

I don’t greet people first because I don’t want to exist.”

——-

“After three months of applying and getting rejected, I finally got a job offer. Now, I don’t feel like I deserve it.”

March Secrets!

“I might take a job on the other side of the country just to be close to a girl I’m falling in love with. Oh, and she has a boyfriend. Am I being stupid?”

——-

“I’m pretty sure all of my friends actually hate me.”

——-

“I think I’m borderline eating disorder, but I don’t know I could ever admit that to anyone I care about.”

——-

“I’ve been home for over 24 hours and my family just noticed I was here. And then when they noticed they asked me why I was even there in the first place. Last I checked I lived here too.”

——-

“My bf gets weird whenever I mention my rehab visit. It was way before we even met, and he’s never even met the drug addict me. But still he gets all quiet. I AM NOT ASHAMED THAT I SOUGHT HELP FOR MY PROBLEM.”

——-

“My two roommates are so immature. But I don’t mean silly or goofy, I mean the way they handle situations and what their life goals are is so below their age, it’s ridiculous. As much as I love being friends with them, they’re hard to put up with. I feel like they think I’m not fun or interesting, but I think I’m just acting my age.”

September Secrets!

“I wish I could fall in love.”

——-

“We haven’t been dating long, but I know right now that I want to spend the rest of my life with you.”

——-

“YOU are my ex. YOU told me what to wear, how to be, and made me feel guilty for being anything close to attractive. I’m with someone else now, who actually treats me right. But today, I was nice to a guy and he got the wrong message and grabbed at me, tried to feel me up. I told him I loved the man I was with now and he accepted that and left. After he did, I cried so hard. I felt so guilty. I called my boyfriend, no answer. I texted him EVERY detail about what happened. And I’m still waiting for him to call back (he’s most likely asleep).

After such a long relationship with YOU I don’t know how to have a healthy one. I LOVE THIS MAN I AM WITH NOW, but still your rules and judgments haunt me every day. I don’t want him to leave me, so I still find myself following your rules, even if I know that HE is way less judgmental, and so much more loving than you. I escaped you physically, how do I escape you mentally?”

——-

“Have you ever thought about ending it all? Because things aren’t going your way? Me too.  Ending it all is just a permanent solution to a temporary problem! Don’t do it! Someone somewhere would never be the same if you did!

Shit had been incredibly rough for me lately, had those same thoughts. Take a breath, relax, knock out or of those problems at a time, and you’ll be ok. Doesn’t hurt to pray about it either.

-Sincerely,

A guy who has even down quite the hellacious road lately-BUT- is surviving and overcoming to Succeed!”

July Secrets!

“All I can say is I was just trying to keep the peace. And all you wanted to do was blame me for everything instead of actually confronting the right people about how you felt. And now here we are… with you telling me we can no longer be friends because I was trying to include you. So now I am here… feeling hurt and confused.”

——-

“Dear Mom,

I hate you. I know we are like “BFF’s 4-Eva” or whatever you want to call it, but I think you are the most immature and selfish middle-aged woman I have ever met. You weren’t supposed to be my friend, you were supposed to be my mother. Now that I’m in my 20s you want to try to have a say in what I do? You want to talk to me about how “you’re my mother and you worry”? You think I believe that you’re on the straight and narrow now? You’re a horrible liar, you always have been, but I’m not. That’s why I can smile and laugh when I see your face. That’s why I can tell you I love you. But I’ll lie till the day you die, make you feel like you have that daughter you always thought you had. But sorry mom, you killed that girl a long time ago.”

——-

“I’ve tried to kill myself multiple times. It kills me that my family doesn’t know. It kills me that my sorority sisters don’t know. But probably more than anything, it kills me that of the couple of people that know, only one is someone who hasn’t broken my heart.”

——-

“I know I harp on this subject every year, but 7 years ago today, I sliced my Achilles tendon on my right ankle- straight up in 2. Cast for 2 months, walking boot for 1, physical therapy for 3, and I still occasionally/rarely walk funny because of it (mini limp/gimp). It just makes me wonder what I could have done in life if it weren’t for that major setback. Truly thankful for the small things in life.”

——-

“I really like the way things are going between us, you seem to be perfect and your so sweet. However, when you finally hear my story, my history….I doubt you’ll stick around.”