October Secrets!

“This is my last semester and im a transfer student. I feel real lonely on campus, like I’m new to this area and I don’t really know anyone. I’ve been letting myself go because I’m depressed. I haven’t been running or working out like I would if i was back home. I thought coming to a new place would make me feel different about myself but it hasn’t. I don’t feel like i fit in here. Im lost.”

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“I only had sex with you because it was your birthday and I thought it would help me get over my ex. You kept telling me how great I was and how many times you came, but I just felt disgusted with myself.”

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“I was raped.”

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“I actually don’t like not having school tomorrow…I was looking forward to getting tutoring before a midterm, and work is the reason why I wake up in the morning. I’m worried I’ll sleep the day away and not work like I’m supposed to.”

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“I’ve never been more alone than I am right now. I have nobody and I’m losing hope.”

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“Sometimes when I pose for pictures at parties, and am laughing and know I look good, I wonder if you will see them on facebook and miss me just a little.”

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“I’m scared that I’m making the wrong decision with my degree.  What if I fail?  I’ll disappoint everyone around me, but more importantly, I’ll disappoint myself.”

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“One day I hope you realize, I am in love with you.”

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“I don’t get this. Why is this happening? Its been more than an year and its just not getting better. I am a guy who any girl will be lucky to be with but things are just bot getting started in college. I don’t even have friends! I am tired of people telling me to wait for the right one. BS! Don’t know how to get the first step now. There are so many people who get disappointed by someone everyday, wish something could bring all together. Struggling badly to come up from this. And strangely I’m sure, I’m not the only one going through all this. Wish something could bring all together.”

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“I seriously feel they are so many students on this enormous campus who feel they are lonely and surely deserve better.
But I still can’t figure out how to bring this to an end. There has to be some way, so that all these people at least get in touch with each other.
Some one has to step up! But how?
People can do wonders, once they know they can~

P.S. I am one of them!”

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“I’m not as strong as everyone thinks I am. I wish I could tell you.”

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“I’m hot and I know it. I get a lot of attention from the female engineering population, but I don’t want to hook up with the people I’m going to be working with for the next year and a half. Why don’t other girls pay attention to engineering guys? We’re much better than the fratstars.”

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“Today I binged. I ate a bunch a food after i told myself i wouldn’t and i was so mad at myself because I was finally gaining control. I almost binged a few hours before that but stopped myself so I was especially mad that i actually did later. I did something I never thought i would do: I forced myself to throw up most of the food i ate only 20 min after. This was my first time doing this, and I’m scared at how easy it was. I’m afraid that now that i’ve done this that I will use it as a safety net for when i binge in the future, so to speak. At the same time though, i feel that this is a turning point. I never EVER thought I’d become one of those people who’d do that to themselves. So now that this has happened, I pray that it will somehow affect my self-control because i’m so sick of being without it.”

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“I thought when I saw you, I would’ve broken down and lost it. I cannot begin to say how relieved and speechless I am that all I feel is happy for you, and complete that I have now closed this door. Now I can attest to the fact that for the very first time in my life, I am in love with someone. Not just infatuated or in love with the idea of them, but actually in love to the point where I see this future I didn’t quite make out with you. It might be the scariest feeling I’ve experienced, but it is also the most thrilling and exhilarating as well. I just want you to know that I’m genuinely glad that you’re getting your life together, and I hope that you feel the way about her like I do about him. I can only wish you the best and good luck, and this is absolutely the best feeling ever. I’m happy. I’m in love. And I wouldn’t change this moment for the world.”

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“How can you be with someone for so long and not be comfortable or trust them? What did you do this past year? You have my heart, don’t break it please, one more break and it won’t be repairable.”

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“If I could trade the whole of my earthly existence to be a ghost and follow you around, hearing your lovely voice and seeing your beautiful smile for the rest of your life, I would do it. I hope heaven is a clip reel of everything you’ve ever done on loop for all of eternity. I hate that the thoughtless and unfeeling world is full of people who assume you’re as confident as you act, I hate that they’ve scarred you so and left you thinking you’re worth hating, hate that I can’t throw myself into the path of their harsh words. Your dreams and your flaws are perfect, perfect. Your friendship has cost me more than you’ll ever know but I can’t hold it against you for a second. And…I’m happy you have had a chance to fall into real love, after all these years, and pray she’ll treat you as well as I would have. You deserve an amazing life, with someone better than this broken creature. But if it’s not too much to ask, please, don’t forget me :’)”

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“It’s barely been 3 days, but I miss you so much. I don’t know how we can fix this. But if you really say you can’t imagine things without me, we should be able to, right? I was so happy with you, and I find it so incredibly frustrating that that one thing was our Achilles heel. That one thing. I tried to compromise, I really did. But I feel like instead of meeting in the middle, I walked further than I thought I would have to and even then, you didn’t budge. I tried so hard. You said you did too. Did we give it our best? I still feel like there’s something there for us. But you’re so stubborn. I want you to realize that. I have my faults too, I’ll tell you that now. We lack so much communication. For now, everyone tells me to maybe move on. But I think you’re worth it. I really hope you are. I want to talk to you so badly, but of course I need to give it time. I sincerely hope we can work this out, because I love you. I’ve never met anyone so much like me, and I can’t imagine not seeing or talking to you anymore. I’m so frustrated. Get your priorities straight.”

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“I guess since I didn’t freak out, everyone assumed I already knew, or didn’t care. You really blindsided me on this one. I thought we were finally doing good. We spent a year picking up the pieces of our relationship trying to fix things. Then when we seem to be doing great you just what? Gave up? Moved on? Wanted something new? I’ve wasted half a decade on you. I thought we would get married, I was supposed to have your baby. And I still want to. Even after you leaving me for her. Without a note, without a call. How do you just forget about someone like that? How did you stop caring so quickly? I could really use the pointers, because I can’t stop thinking of you. I’d let you hurt me again in a heartbeat, just to have you back for a moment.”

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“My heart breaks every day for those who do not know that they are beautiful, that they are worthy of respect and honor, and that they are enough.  I wish each person would know what it is to love and be loved unconditionally.  I strive each day to show love, and I cannot bear the thought that my life may not reflect this.”

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“The meanest thing you ever did was come around, and now I’m ruined.”

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“This is to the boy who is in my English class every other afternoon: Would I be out of line if I told you you are the most handsome frat guy I ever met? I love your scruffy beard, and your golden blonde hair. You are the complete package (pun intended), You can invite me to your frat house anytime!”

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“Dear Whoever You Are,

I’m sorry. I’m sorry I ever said anything. I don’t know if it was my place or not. But we were taking a test, one that I’d stayed up half the night studying for, and there you were using your phone. I don’t know if you were cheating, and I never said you were, but you were using your phone on a test that I had spent hours studying for and I saw you several times and you made me so mad! I worked so hard preparing for that test. It didn’t seem like you were just checking the time, like you told the professor when he came and talked to you. I’m sorry I told the TA about what I saw. I had even left the room, and I came back to tell on you. Who am I to do something like that? Not a good person, or so it feels. I can’t believe myself. I hate the idea that I was That Person. I hate myself. You know what’s pathetic, though? The main reason I came back and said something was to alleviate my own guilt in seeing you do something wrong. Why do I feel the need to fix things that aren’t even my business? Why didn’t anyone else see it? Why me? The funny part—or I guess the somewhat tragic part—is that I felt even more guilt after saying something than I did before. It didn’t do any good. And now I’m scared you hate me. I don’t want you to hate me. I don’t hate you—just myself. But you know what? Part of me doesn’t care what you think. Part of me is furious towards you, that you did something wrong and I’m the one feeling guilty. Please forgive me and my terrible guilt complex.

Sincerely,
Anonymous”

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“Why do people always look to me for answers and expect me to be a leader? Sometimes I want talk about my problems. I never asked for any of this.”

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“You’ll never know how much this kills me every single day. I miss you so much it hurts.”

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“Every time I read these, I want to help the people who are having trouble. I want to be a shoulder to cry on, someone to listen to. But the truth is, I’m too busy, too selfish, too lazy, too much of everything that I shouldn’t be. I have too many problems of my own to work out without worrying about what other people are going through. And I hate that in myself.”

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“When my roommate’s mother came to pick him up for Spring Break 12 she made a prejudice comment about me. They didn’t know I was in my room. It was my birthday.”

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“Hey roommate five feet away from me: You make THE NASTIEST SOUNDS WHEN YOU EAT!!!! God I can’t stand it!! hahaha it feels so good to “yell” at you, you’re actually a real bitch.”

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